


Only in the darkness

by Bunnybunkins



Category: Holby City
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-05 21:13:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17332454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bunnybunkins/pseuds/Bunnybunkins
Summary: Serena has her life in the daylight and another in the darkness.





	Only in the darkness

**Author's Note:**

> This has unsaid cheating in it so I have not put a tag for Bernie.

It was a game they played, it hadn't been discussed, arranged. There had been no planning, it simply was. 

The first kiss had been unexpected but brewing around them from the first moment. It had been like no other kiss, Bernie's kisses were passionate and filled with love, they were knowing and confident, even from the start it had been an exchange of what was known even if not fully felt or desired until that moment. 

No Leah wasn't like that, this wasn't like that at all. It was fire, blazing and destroying. It was a meeting, their mouths had met and it was claiming. It was brief but evident this was a need, want she had no realm of control or understanding of. 

Leah had curved her mouth, opened up to her and it had raged inside her, burnt her from the inside, surged through her like a fever that had given no warning. There had been an attraction and lust? Yet had there even been that? Was this lust? No this was simply felt, it wasn't feeling, on no level anything like Bernie.

Bernie was safe, she was home. When they kissed she was filled with need and longing but also a sense of what this was, before it had even began. A love and knowing so built up over friendship, respect and time.  
Their lovemaking was mixed with a deep physical need but a soulfulness she had never felt before, speech without words. 

The firsy time she had sex with Leah, she would describe every moment with Bernie as love, no this was not love, this was sex but so unlike meaningless exchanges, brief times with lovers before Bernie. Male of course, Bernie was her only female lover, of course till now. 

No the first time with Leah had been consuming, it wasn't that Leah was a passionate nor the sex, although it was. No it was that they both knew what this was, even though they had no idea what that was. It was in them, bodies had ached and craved, claimed. 

Imprinted and almost consumed every cell and vein like a fever. Their bodies had slipped and melted, even the first time their fingers, mouths, every aspect of them had given and sought what it had needed from the other. 

No this was not like Bernie. Bernie was love, a love that burnt but covered, secured and settled. Leah was raging, consuming with no corner or safe place for rest. It was burning oneself alive till nothing was left. 

Bernie was entwined fingers, warm arms. Cosy fires and walking arm in arm. It was a knowing without question or word what it meant, what was between them. The end of the day, the first kiss of dawn, aching and giving, waiting and no need to ask or wonder. 

Leah was unknown, heat and ice that offered no release. Each touch, kiss, sigh and look fueled more. Eyes that offered no softness or home, there was no home here, simply wastelands of the needful. Both needing and taking without whispered endearment.

It was meeting without an exchange of time or place. A look created without a request, a role, a desire without word. 

No place she would set foot with Bernie. Places for Bernie were bright and real, shared places of pleasure, places to be and enjoy open and there. 

The places of this where dark, forbidden. She left all trace of love and safety when she set foot in the dark. It was bitter, raged with bitterness and need. 

Each time different but the same. She would seek her, this was never discussed simply was. 

After the last time, they had said goodbye. There was an exchanged of pleasantness that had no place between them, a goodbye, an invitation for something, more. 

The club, like all the clubs, bars, all the places, was dark. She would watch, again not agree just how it was. She would watch and Leah sought, she never needed to seek of course. She would watch as Leah moved with them, opened and allowed, the briefest of touches and looks. The air filled with want, she could see it, smell it, feel it. 

Leah could be touched and desired but not desire, looked at but not look. Those were the rules they had never agreed to.  
The black fabric would offer what was to be offered, open and clear. The dip of her neck invited eager touches, it sought the kisses and nips it recieved 

Yes Leah could be touched, kissed. All, however had to be in view, her sight solely on her, sighs and need shown only to her. 

This night was the same, a dark blonde, taller than her, curvier and full draped around Leah. Fingers lost in her short hair, her head pulled back, she could see the flick, hint of the tongue that traced her neck. The music was dark and allowed pressing of bodies, the air hot and heavy as they moved together. 

Her eyes however were locked with her own as another's mouth fought to claim her. Blue so clear even in the darkest of dark, clear and connected. 

The tenison built as she watched the blonde's desire, Leah knew what she was allowed and not allowed. She knew when it was time to open herself, to her, only her. 

It aroused her, her nipples always the first to show need, hard and burning. Every movement of fabric against them agonizing pain and pleasure. The heat rose through her as her stomach flipped over, aching causing her head to spin and the lightheaded sickness it caused to pulse. The sweat on her palms, the base of her neck a betrayal of the control she fought for. 

There was other unspoken rules of course. She was aware of the reaction she caused, got from other women. They would snake around her, offering, wanting. She could not look, touch nor did she have any wish to.  
She had no other need, Bernie was love and this, this unlocked the hidden parts of her. 

And it was always for the darkness. Their meetings in daylight were limited now due to not being in the same department but any meeting must not betray what they were in the darkness. No chased fingertips, the briefest of touches, no calls or messages. The day was Bernie and these nights were their's.

She watched as Leah moved away from the blonde, she watched, tracked her each movement as she moved through the crowds. The scent of sex and desire, heat clinging as bodies moved together, there was nothing but them. This moment. 

The blonde watched until Leah stood before her, no words needed as an understanding passed between them, Leah was hers. Every touch, moment she allowed, was for her, only her. 

There was no touching, she moved and Leah followed. The toilets were empty as she pushed her and locked the door. No words as she grabbed her neck, the barely uttered hiss the only sound that betrayed her need.

Her mouth found her neck and burnt, the press and movement of each kiss pulling her further in. Shaping her body to press Leah hard against the wall she bit back her own response, her moan, yet the curves of Leah's lips told her she had witnessed it. 

Their eyes never breaking connection as she used her right hand to pin Leah's wrists above her head, watched her lips part, she watched Leah's neck arch back, felt the heat between them as her other hand trailed down over her neck, throat, listened to the needing as her fingertips skimmed her nipples, the fabric of her dress thin and down, down until..

Barely touching her she felt Leah pull her wrists as she tightened her hand, simply shaking her head as she pushed the material of her panties aside. Feeling her react to the next movement without word. Leah twisted, her body so tiny and flexible, it was a wonder. 

She held her against the wall, her mouth now pressed against her neck she could taste her sweat, smell her need. Releasing Leah's wrists, she knew now to keep them up, not to move them, as she sank to her knees. The movement causing her blouse to stretch agony against her nipples.

Beads of sweat gathered on her forehead as she moved her legs apart, ghosting her fingertips over Leah's thighs as she pulled her panties down. The moans come now, the begging both aware others could hear, as her tongue dipped against her centre, her core. 

She knew, even wrapped up in her, claiming every drop, that Leah's nails clawed the walls, that her breasts were hard against the cold wall, the slow tease it offered her aching nipples as she bit her lip. She knew the bruise it would cause, she knew it would be seen and discussed. 

Another unspoken rule. Leah could be marked, she could not. Daytime could not show the night, two sides.  
She had heard the whispers of marks she left across Leah's body. A claim of this, that this part of her belonged to, her. 

Allowing her nails to sink into her soft flesh as she held her ass firm against her face. Over and over she tore into her, giving no time to recover as the sharp sweetness of each movement of the night gushed from Leah, her tongue accepting and demanding as she heard her whimper, beg for more, for a release. 

Giving one moment of recovery before her eyes sought Leah's, a look, knowing passed as Leah bent to her knees, cold against the floor as she freed her legs, slipped her panties over her legs. She lifted a foot onto the sink allowing more access which Leah took as she arched her neck between her thighs causing her to buck, bite hard on her knuckles. 

Pure white flashes behind her eyelids as she bit her skin raw, a fall on the way to the car after a hard day, a sin mark she would take.  
Her own voice felt alien and distant as she listened to the begging, needing it cried. 

Warmth, Leah's tongue, mouth so wet and warm. Soft, barely skimming as it came again and again before pushing inside. Her core pressing to met the wetness of her seeking tongue, in and out, in and oh, oh there and it came. Need blinding her, deafening in every sense as it passed through her, she heard Leah groan as she filled her mouth. 

The kisses, this was need. There was no love but that did not mean there was nothing. Their kisses were full of need, tongues seeking, teeth chasing and a brink of something, something that could only hide in the darkness, something too raw and unheeling that must not see the light.


End file.
